A voice of wisdom on the radio

I was listening to the radio and they were taking calls in response to a woman's request for advice.  Apparently, her fiance asked that she make a commitment not to drink during their marriage.  It didn't sound like this woman had a drinking problem, it sounded like her fiance had a problem with people who drink or simply didn't want alcohol to play any part in their marriage.  She wanted to know what other people might do in her situation.  Would they give up drinking for their life partner?

I expected the responses to be short and shallow.  I expected to hear, "You shouldn't have to give up anything for anyone else." or "You shouldn't go through with the marriage if he's already trying to control you."

Instead, what I heard was a woman who, even just replying to a random question on the radio, expressed honesty, sensitivity, genuine caring and what I believe to be great wisdom. She shared her own story of how her husband asked that she quit drinking.  She actually did stop drinking, but not for him, she stopped because she realized that she had a problem.  She said that she stopped drinking because it was a problem in her relationship, but that in doing so, she became aware that the alcohol was only the tip of the iceberg.  There were other problems and they ran deep through the relationship and in her life.  She pointed out that a request from your partner to stop drinking may unearth much more than just a drinking problem.  It may change the relationship completely or eventually end it.


The radio personality mentioned that he didn't think that the woman who was asking for advice actually had a drinking problem.  The woman's response to that was to carefully think through what the fiance's request meant to their relationship.  Would it mean that he wouldn't want to be around her family members if they drink? Would it mean that he would want her to limit her contact with other people in her life who drink? How would it affect the rest of their relationship?

All from a radio show.

So much can be learned from others when they share their story... Her story impacted me.  I'm so thankful she picked up the phone.